I have been single now for about a month. This is the first time in almost two years that I find myself single, and it can be rather scary. I think the most terrifying part about it, is that I'm finally happy. If I have no desire to do something, I don't have to. I don't have to compromise anymore. Which sounds incredibly selfish, but as someone in her early twenties, it's is a fantastic feeling.
I would lie to you if I said that I haven't been talking to someone and while we did go on a date Friday, I'm not worried about what happens next. If it works, that's great, if it doesn't, its not the end of the world. So many women, myself included, discuss how they lose themselves in their relationships. One of my personal heroes is Liz Gilbert, and when I saw Julia Roberts playing Liz, talking about loving herself, dots just started to connect and I just felt so relieved that this wasn't just me, and that there are always other options. Choosing to stay takes just as much effort as choosing to go, because there will always be emotional strains and drains, so the question is, which option is right for me?
So right now, I am choosing to focus on myself. If a man happens to come along, fantastic, if not, then I'm going to be just fine. It has taken me my whole life plus some extended time I therapy to recognize that I am what is best for me. And that I am so lucky, blessed, and grateful for myself and my happiness.
Have a great rest of your weekend before the dreaded Monday arrives, and Go Pats! :-)