"What do you want for Christmas...?"

Welcome to the best and worst part of every year. It's that time where we are forced to spend time with unwanted family and purchase insane gifts, like the combination coffee maker-cellphone. While I sound nice and cynical, I don't really mean it. I love the Holidays. I am a big fan of Christmas, (being raised Christian and all) though my favorite holiday, Thanksgiving, gets incredibly overshadowed thanks to Black Friday and the big guy with the beard and a red-nosed reindeer. I don't hold a grudge, I just enjoy the season.
But one of the things that has been incredibly hard for me this year was to figure out what I wanted. I don't mean in the "I want the new iPod", or "a magical Unicorn" kind of way. But what I want to get out of this wonderful time of year.
I was lucky enough, these three delicate days before Christmas to finally figure out, and actually receive what I wanted for Christmas, even before I could articulate it. This morning my boss walked into my office, thanked me for the card that I had left on his desk this morning, and handed me a card. He then thanked me for the work that I've been doing and then went on about his day. I opened the card and yes, there was a bonus inside, but money wasn't what I wanted (though I wouldn't turn it down...) It was the little note on the inside of the card, again thanking me for all the hard work and how great it was to have me around.
This was when the light appeared, (literally and figuratively, minutes later the bulb above my desk was replaced...) all I had wanted was to be appreciated. I don't want the new Kindle, or any kind of crazy junk for my car, I wanted my existence here on Earth to be recognized with the easiest, and by far cheapest, gift there is to give, appreciation.
I don't need validation that I do a good job, my ego does that enough for me as I leave my office night after night. I had just hoped that someone would notice what I do and that no matter what I give everything my all.
And that's what this wonderful season is all about. While the kids love the toys and the Santa routine, the rest of us just want to be shown that we are, in fact, appreciated. Please don't mistake my tale here for something other than what it is, my realization that all I want for Christmas is appreciation. I'm not going to go on for line after line for hours on end about how we should all be nice, hold hands, and skip together. I just think that we, as a group, need to put down some of the crap that we carry everywhere and start actually thinking. Start actually feeling something again. And hell, appreciation may not be what all of us want, some may want love, or general fulfillment, or some other kind of intrinsic need. I just needed appreciation, and the ability to learn to articulate it to other. So here it is, my articulation, my response to my Mom and boyfriend's continual nagging about, "What do you want for Christmas?"  Give me a hug, say thank you, and that's all I need this year.

Merry Christmas, Happy 3rd night of Hanukkah, Happy Holidays (no matter what they are), Season's Greetings and all that jazz... :)